Wednesday, May 29, 2013

13w1d: Confidence Rising

So, after that last post, I realized how silly I was being and decided to tell the rest of my friends.  I called them up, everyone was happy, and I haven’t worried since!

Yeah, right.

Actually, after that last post the achiness in my pelvis continued to nag at me.  It didn’t hurt much but it was constant and didn’t seem to be improving, and I started to worry that I had a UTI.  Finally I decided to call my doctor to ease my worries.  Everyone online calls their doctor and is told, “If it doesn’t hurt more than menstrual cramps and there’s no spotting, it’s normal.”  It didn’t and there wasn’t, so I made the call confident I’d get that reassurance and be able to move on.  I didn’t - instead, the nurse said, “We have an appointment open at 9:15 tomorrow, would you like to come in then?”  Once an appointment was offered I couldn’t say no (obviously they suspected something was horribly wrong if they weren’t giving me the standard line about spotting!), so I made plans to go in the next morning.

Of course, when I woke up the next day the pain was almost gone.  But since the missed appointment charge is almost as much as my co-pay, and I’ll never pass up the opportunity for an ultrasound, I decided to go in anyway.  The doctor was really nice (I’ve now met three out of the four doctors in this practice and like them all) and told me not to feel silly about coming in; since they have the ultrasound machine right there in their office, she said that they don’t mind taking a quick peek when we’re worried.  So that’s what we did and – shocker – the babies were fine, even moving around.  She also checked my cervix and – shocker again – it was long and closed, just like it’s supposed to be.

I was there for less than five minutes but it was very reassuring, especially since at the time of that ultrasound I was past the 12 week mark so starting to be in the range where some people say that the first trimester is over.  And with that reassurance, we really did tell a LOT of people over the weekend!  There are still a few friends left in the dark, but just because we haven’t seen them in person since we started telling and haven’t gotten to the point of calling people with the news yet.  I even told my coworkers!  And, amazingly, I haven’t had my post-telling panic attack thinking that we jinxed everything!

Speaking of telling, I also figured out the solution to a problem that’s been nagging at me.  See, I’ve been torn about what exactly to do when we “announce” on Facebook (I’m not a huge fan of Facebook “announcements” but whatever).  I want to acknowledge my infertility in some way, since I’m sure there are others out there having problems and I want them to know that they’re not alone, but I don’t want the news of my infertility (which has been kept 100% OFF Facebook) to overshadow the happy news.  Basically I’ve been trying to figure out a secret code that only infertiles will be able to decipher.

What I’ve finally decided to do is to “like” my fertility center on Facebook at about the same time that I announce my pregnancy.  I’ve always wanted to like the center, but haven’t been brave enough to publically do it.  By doing it at about the same time as I go public, I figure that anyone who is curious will put two and two together, and people who don’t think about infertility probably won’t even notice.  I’m really happy with this plan, and Henry even said that he is going to do the exact same thing!

So we’re almost ready to go public.  Assuming everything goes well at our NT screen tomorrow, there will be nothing holding us back!

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