The Third Degree

While on our run Thanksgiving morning, Henry and I prepared for the big question: “When are you having kids?”  We wanted an answer that was honest and would prevent people from asking us again when they see us at Christmas, but wasn't too revealing.  We decided on some variation of, “We’re trying, but it hasn’t been as easy as we thought, so we’re seeing a doctor who is helping us figure it out.” And then, if there were follow up questions, something like, “We’d really prefer not to talk about it.”

Of course, since we were ready, it never came up.  But there were a few questions - totally normal questions! - we got asked over the weekend that we found surprisingly hard to answer.  Fellow infertiles, take note! These are the real stumpers of the holiday season.

Would you like wine or a champagne cocktail while we wait for dinner?

If I was answering honestly, I would have said: I'm trying to limit my alcohol intake because of my fertility treatments, so I've planned to have one glass of wine with dinner and one glass of champagne with dessert.  So, even though I've never turned down a drink before, I'll have a water until it's time for my allocated alcohol serving.

But instead I said: Oooh, I'll try the cocktail!

What have you been up to?

If I was answering honestly, I would have said: Doctors appointments.  Commenting on Babycenter threads.  Learning how to mix medications and give shots.  Trying to bank up some goodwill at work.  Watching Law and Order on Netflix. Crying. Wondering if my decision not to have surgery was the right one. Writing a secret blog.

But instead I said: We've been kind of boring, just in a routine.

What do you want for Christmas?

If I was answering honestly, I would have said: A baby.

But instead I said: You know, I'm really not sure.

What are you doing for New Years?

If I was answering honestly, I would have said: Well that will be after our transfer but before our pregnancy test, so I won't be drinking and won't be able to do anything strenuous.  So, probably laying on the couch, eating pizza, watching the ball drop and trying to resist the urge to pee on a stick.

But instead I said: We'll probably lay low this year.

What banal questions did you find surprisingly hard to answer? Leave them in the comments and we'll make a list to help us get ready for the next round of holiday parties!